Clever Gambling Puns

Clever Gambling Puns 8,8/10 9765 reviews

My girlfriend left me because of my gambling addiction. She claimed I was an idiot.

💬︎

📅︎ Jul 18

Funny Gambling Quotes. TIPS FOR THE GAMBLER 'There is a very easy way to return from a casino with a small fortune: go there with a large one.' — Jack Yelton 'The safest way to double your money is to fold it over once and put it in your pocket.'

What do you call a herd of cows gambling at a marijuana dispensary?

Jul 7, 2015 - Funny Gambling. See more ideas about funny, gambling, casino. This compilation contains some of the best quotes we could find related to gambling, luck and money. Since humans have existed they have gambled away their fortunes, and it is probably the fate of man to continue gambling so long as there is anything left to bet on.

💬︎

📅︎ Jun 21

I sold all my body parts to feed my gambling addiction.

💬︎

📅︎ Jun 07

What do you call the toilet of a king with a gambling addiction?

💬︎

📅︎ Mar 17

They told me “you gotta know how to hold em, and how to fold em.”

🤦🏻‍♂️🤦🏻‍♂️🤦🏻‍♂️Dad out.

Clever Gambling Puns Examples

💬︎

📅︎ Jan 04

I'm heartbroken. The Wife broke up with me because of my chronic gambling issues.

💬︎

📅︎ Feb 25

... why do they call it para-dice?

💬︎

📅︎ Feb 20

💬︎

📅︎ Oct 02 2019

I'm gonna bet you 50 bucks that I am no longer addicted to gambling

💬︎

📅︎ Dec 01 2019

Where can you look up the definitions of drug abuse, alcoholism, and problem gambling?

💬︎

📅︎ Nov 08 2019

I bet them I could go longer than them without gambling.

💬︎

📅︎ Jul 10 2019

I was talking to my gambling friend. I told him that I went to the races with my wife.

'Did you win?' he asked.

'Of course not,' I replied. 'We didn't even run.'

💬︎

📅︎ May 09 2019

Gambling addiction hotlines would do so much better

💬︎

📅︎ Feb 13 2019

I tried opening a casino even though gambling was outlawed

💬︎

📅︎ Apr 06 2019

My gambling addicted brother has been missing for a while. Last we saw him he lost his life savings in a game of poker.

Clever Gambling Puns 2020

💬︎

📅︎ Jan 20 2019

you poker

💬︎

📅︎ Dec 29 2018

a casino was offering free mexican food for all who lost more than $50 in gambling

this is because its clearly nacho lucky day if you lost that much

💬︎

📅︎ Nov 12 2018

'I wish you would stop gambling!' I shouted at my son.

'You're no better yourself!' he snapped.

I said, 'Exactly. That's why I don't encourage it.'

💬︎

📅︎ Jan 12 2019

When did Adam & Eve discover God didn't like gambling?

💬︎

📅︎ Jun 06 2018

Did you hear about the buddhist monk with a huge gambling problem?

💬︎

📅︎ Sep 24 2017

High steaks

💬︎

📅︎ Sep 02 2017

Too many damn cheetahs.

💬︎

📅︎ Jun 25 2013

That Coldplay song must be about a girl with a serious craps/gambling addiction.

Clever Gambling Puns Funny

💬︎

📅︎ Feb 09 2016

My dad occasionally likes to go gambling in Atlantic City...

Me: How did you like Atlantic City?

Dad: It was great! I came home with a small fortune!

Me: Wow! How did you manage that?

Dad: Well, I left home with a large fortune.

💬︎

📅︎ Aug 01 2015

My friend was just about done gambling and he said this.

Friend: well I guess I'm done.Dealer: alright I can color you up if you want.friend gives the dealer his chipsFriend: I'm going to need what Obama promised us Americans?Dealer: what?Friend:'change'Dealer:....

Our other friend started laughing too hard and had to leave the area.

💬︎

📅︎ Aug 26 2014

Because there are too many cheetahs.

💬︎

📅︎ Jul 16 2013

(got this from my dad, in a chain email no less.)

Do Las Vegas churches accept gambling chips?

Clever Gambling Puns List

This may come as a surprise to those of you not living in Las Vegas , but there are more Catholic churches than casinos.

Not surprisingly, some worshipers at Sunday services will give casino chips rather than cash when the basket is passed.

Since they get chips from many different casinos, the churches have devised a method to collect the offerings.

The churches send all their collected chips to a nearby Franciscan monastery for sorting and then the chips are taken to the casinos of origin and cashed in.

This is done by the chip monks!

💬︎

📅︎ Aug 14 2014

'What's the one answer to the question 'Gambling Problem?' you don't want to hear?

💬︎

📅︎ Dec 31 2013

Too many Cheetahs!

💬︎

📅︎ Dec 17 2013

Please note that this site uses cookies to personalise content and adverts, to provide social media features, and to analyse web traffic. Click here for more information.